I believe the three most powerful words put together in the second testament come from John 11:35 – ‘Then Jesus wept.”  It’s not only the human side of Jesus that we see here but the very human.  Then the people who saw Jesus weep went on to say, “This man healed a blind man, why couldn’t he keep Lazarus from dying?”  Good question.  And before Jesus wept, Lazarus’ sister Mary fell to Jesus’ feet and said, “Lord, if you had been there, my brother would not have died”. 

The reason I bring this up is because we are in a time at LCUMC where we are actively seeking  God’s presence as part of the Rule of Life and then writing about our experiences.  But sometimes God isn’t present in the way we are seeking.  When Jesus wept it’s as if Jesus’ grief goes so deep that it is for the whole world that Jesus is weeping and the tragedy of the human condition is to live in a world where again and again God is not present, at least not in the way and to the degree that man needs him. 

Well last Thursday I actively sought God’s presence.  I left work an emotional wreck.  I also wept.  I took a long walk and began questioning my place in life and where I should go?  I cried as I walked and hoped that God would comfort me in a  ‘way that transcends all peace and understanding’ and blah blah blah, the bible says that somewhere else I believe. 

Over the course of my weekend and in the process of trying to hear God’s direction for my life,  I thought of the opposite of the verse where Jesus wept.  It appears in Genesis and instead of crying, we see God laughing.  It begins in Genesis 18:12 and ends with God laughing at Sarah, Abraham’s wife.  Sarah just was told that she was finally pregnant.  Well into her elderly years and way past the time of being able to become pregnant, Sarah had to laugh.  The thought of being such an old lady and a new mother made her somewhat hysterical.  Perhaps the thought of getting into a job that she didn’t feel equipped with made her that way.  Who could blame her?  Maybe I felt that way last week.  I was working a job I felt I wasn’t totally prepared for and I freaked out.  There actually was a time when I was coming out of the downstairs catacombs and the railing to the stairwell broke off into my hands and I too let out a hysterical giggle.  As though, ‘this can not really be happening.’.  But it was happening and sometimes you have to laugh at the reality even though you really want to cry. 

And so in this passage in Genesis where Sarah laughs we see God as being quite human.  Sarah laughs and denies it and God confirms that she definitely did laugh and the exchange they make, back and forth, the arguing over laughter, is quite hilarious and quite human.  I need a God that I can relate to.  I seek a God that I can access and who will laugh and cry with me.  And although God doesn’t always give me the answers that I want nor does he always give me the guidance when I need it, I know that he’s out there laughing and crying with me and that feels pretty good.

From the Rule of Life:

We will be present to God, chasing after God’s heart with authenticity and vulnerability.
We will be present to ourselves, seeking wellness for our minds, hearts, souls, and bodies.

The challenge to presence can be a difficult one for me. Like so many other people, I have a tendency to fill my plate too full, always believing that I can schedule one more activity, fit in one more class a week, or have dinner with one more group of friends. I rush from one thing to another, every day of the week a different rainbow of commitments. I love my work, and a hectic schedule comes with it, but I recognize that at a certain point rushing around between obligations does not permit a life of true presence in any of the places that I have committed myself.

Because of this personality tendency and the hectic circumstances of my own life at the moment, our team’s focus on practicing presence has come at a perfect time for me. Over the past several weeks, I have begun to weave a thread of presence, or mindfulness, into my daily life. For me, this consists in the simple-on-the-surface, yet difficult in practice, habit of bringing my mind to rest in the one activity that I am engaged in at the moment. If I am teaching English to a class of Burmese refugees, then I seek to be fully present in the moment of teaching, not allowing my mind to wander to the running group I will participate in that evening. If I am on an hour-long drive to teach another English class, I let myself look out over the road, take in the sunshine, breathe, and focus on the drive (or at least on the book on CD I’m listening to) rather than thinking about the emails I have to return later that night. If I’m listening to a friend talk about her day at work, I focus on her story, looking at her face and listening to her words rather than mentally checking out and figuring out how to gracefully get out of the conversation and get on to the next item on my to-do list. This may sound like a very simple way to live…but it is very hard for me to practice consistently.

This practice of being present to the daily activities of my life is also a way of being present to myself. It slows me down and helps me actually live each moment of my day, rather than rushing through to the next thing. It helps me hear my own soul clearly, recognize and own my emotions, and choose what is best and right for me in each moment.

Being present to each moment also clears the way for me to be present to God. One of the most meaningful rituals of Christian faith for me is the communion table. I love the symbolism of sharing a meal, of bread and wine bringing people together, of Jesus choosing such ordinary things in which to make his presence known. “Every time you eat a piece of bread, every time you take a drink of wine, remember me.” I love to come to the table each week, knowing that just as I am, my community welcomes me to share in a meal of remembrance, deep friendship, and love.

Recently, I’ve been reading a book by Thich Nhat Hanh to learn more about the practice of mindfulness (or “awareness” or “presence”). And as I read this book, I found a beautiful section on presence and the Eucharist:

 “The practice of the Eucharist is a practice of awareness. When Jesus broke the bread and shared it with his disciples, he said, ‘Eat this. This is my flesh.’ He knew that if his disciples would eat one piece of bread in mindfulness, they would have real life…When we breathe, when we are mindful, when we look deeply at our food, life becomes real at that very moment. To me, the rite of the Eucharist is a wonderful practice of mindfulness. In a drastic way, Jesus tried to wake up his disciples.” (Thich Nhat Hanh, “Peace is Every Step”)

So as I live each day, I am seeking to be present to myself, to the activities of my day, to the people in my path, and to God, whose presence comes to us not only every time we eat bread or drink wine, but every time we bring our minds to rest in the unfolding beauty of each moment we live.

Posted by Kari

Over the past weeks I have had lots of things to think of, worry over, and get done.  I found some moments so overwhelming that I wanted to just let it all go and run away.  Then I was challenged once again to consider presence.  How in these overwhelming moments was I going to be present, especially when my initial response was to be absent?  As I spent some time thinking over being present to my life as it was, not as I wanted it to be, I realized that these were opportunities to "work" my patience. 

I was once waiting for a flight to board, delayed by weather and a few transfers the flight was boarding later than intended.  Most people were getting kind of agitated and this little girl, probably 4 years old was enjoying her happy meal.  She started talking to me and soon heard a woman behind us raising her voice to the airline personnel about the delay.  The little girl looked back at me and said, "My teacher always tells me I just got to work my patience!"  I think that may have begun to help me conceive of patience as an active process and choice in the way I live and have my being.  Patience is one of those virtues that I have thought of over the years as an unattainable reality for me...especially with myself.  While other virtues seemed to be something I could develop over time, patience was more of an idea than a practice so it always seemed to be just out of reach.  As I thought more about "working" my patience i realized that one of the reasons it had seemed so out of reach was that it seemed so passive but this invited me to consider being actively patient. 

So over the last week i have been working on the practice of patience.  I found that I tend to swing to the extremes.  I either worry and plan for things that are out of my control in a feeble effort to regain the semblance of control or I just let go of everything as if things don't matter.  So I have been trying to find some place in the middle...a place where I can consider the options that are before me but not seek to determine the future in a vacuum.  I have revisited the practice of taking a few deep breaths before I respond and react to conversations, ideas, or stress.  I have chosen to claim the mantra "I don't know" and remind myself that I don't need to know right now.  In the more "successful" moments of practicing patience I have found comfort in the waiting and greater compassion for my circumstances. 

It has been easy to blame other people in my life for the lack of answers that come to me when and where I want them.  But as I have taken on the responsibility of practicing patience with myself so that I can be more fully present to God and to the people in my life I haven't needed to blame anyone for the wait.  I have come to appreciate the space that is made when decisions aren't sought to alleviate stress but result from an accumulation of moments, fully lived.  While I still hope for some of the answers that so overwhelm me at times, I also have found a place to hold those possibilities with grace and a lot more patience for myself and the results that are coming.  "Working" my patience takes practice and while I hope to learn more as I go, i am grateful for these present moments of peace and hope for all that the future holds.    

Posted by Rebecca

I'm pretty sure I can blame the entirety of Western culture, but I don't know how to stop and be present. Work hard, play hard, sleep hard...and try to squeeze as much time with friends in there as humanly possible.

We don't slow down.

Which is why the Rule of Life gets me every time...especially the pieces regarding self and others:  
  •  We will be present to ourselves, seeking wellness for our minds, hearts, souls, and bodies.
  •  We will be present to our neighbors and creation, paying attention to their needs.

I typically am so focused on the task(s) at hand, that I plow right through my days in an effort to be as efficient and as productive as possible...and often miss the most beautiful moments - and people - life has to offer.

As we've made a point to live out portions of the Rule in weekly segments, I've spent a lot of time the last month working on being present to myself, slowing down, breathing, enjoying the moments.  It's been an incredibly valuable - and healthy - slowing down experience.

But perhaps one of the most valuable interactions I've had is not with myself, but with my roommate. He's a real sweet guy from India who spends his time working on his doctorate (apparently having to do with lasers? I think he's trying to take over the world).  We rarely find ourselves in the same room, and when we do I tend to be on my way to this, focused on finishing that, rushing off to the next thing.

This past week I determined to pause and connect with him in conversation.  It took some doing, but we found ourselves chatting Friday night. 

...and it was phenomenal.

His background is fascinating to me, and it's been really interesting to learn about the parallels we've found between American Christianism and Indian Hinduism religious systems.  Here we are, two young men with entirely different backgrounds (so different, in fact, that the steak I cooked for dinner last week was the first cooking of a slab of meat he'd ever witnessed) struggling with many of the same social implications that the corresponding religions of our respective cultures present.

We found in conversation a shared heart for active social engagement and creating the kind of communities that empower people rather than oppress them.  I left the conversation, excited, energized...

...and all because I took a moment to be present.

Posted by Jordan
@jordanupdike

From the Rule of Life:
We will be present to our faith community, engaging in worship, fellowship and mission.

There are a few common strands being weaved together this week.  It’s our first blog post in this new series as the executive team of Lockerbie Central wrestle with the Rule of the Life in real, meaningful, life- and world-changing ways.  I’m the new guy around Lockerbie, posting our first entry in this new series.  Our topic this month: Presence, and I was present Sunday night for my first formal worship experience at LC.  Anytime we have “firsts” like these, it’s often helpful to be reminded of our tradition as  our progressive approach to living the way of Jesus is reinforced by the stories he told.

Sunday Rebecca reflected on the Lectionary text from Matthew:  The parable of the day laborers.  The workers who joined late in the day receive the same rewards as those who put in a long day’s work.  This is to teach us something of the Kingdom of Heaven.  But what?

Let’s dig deeper.

The gospel text is paired with Exodus from the Hebrew tradition this week.  Exodus 16: Quails and manna--I believe this was the small-plate special at Black Market last weekend with a pale ale.  The Exodus narrative finds grumbling Hebrews, a nerve-wrecked Moses, and a covenantal God character striking a deal.  The Divine will provide sustenance for the Hebrews to sustain their journey toward the covenant at Sinai.  Here’s the catch (pay attention here): Those who gather too much manna, by the time they reach their temporary dwellings, it’s been reduced to just enough; those who gather too little will find their volume increased to provide what is needed.

Jesus’ day laborers parable is a retelling of the Exodus story.  Those who spend 50, 60 hours a week juggling non-profits, community commitments, job requirements will find their reward no greater than those who balance faith, family, work, and community.  Those who require the strength of others to provide their needs will not be chastised nor degraded but will find their needs met joyfully from those who may provide.

I worked to be present to my faith community this week, and I did engage in worship Sunday evening, fellowship following, and mission through my relationships.  I have been serving on the LC executive team for some weeks now before actually attending a service.  My manna basket had become too full, my day laboring too long.

The Divine does not wish greed nor self-sacrificing humility, but desires we find balance in our lives that our cup of faith, family, and community each be just enough.  Being present is being balanced.  When you see me next on Sunday warmly greet me so that we both are reminded to be present in that moment.


Posted by Adam
@adamhayden